Okay class. Construct a headline from the following: Kawhi Leonard spurns the Raptors in the middle of the night for his hometown team, the L.A. Clippers. At the same moment southern California experiences a 7.1 earthquake. 

Where did the great French Canadian players go? The 2019 NHL Draft produced an avalanche of players from the U.S. National Development program, Sweden, Finland, the Ontario Hockey League and the Western Hockey League.

You don’t have to ask the impact of the Toronto Raptors winning the NBA title last week. Two million people on the streets of that city speak to the engagement created by the team’s dramatic process through the playoffs. Think of the public’s addiction to the games as Game Of Thrones— except with guys in short pants.

The Golden State Warriors have been playing Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner for much of the 2019 NBA playoffs. You just never know who’s going to show up for the show.

The NBA Finals is the best-on-best in the league. West versus East. Kawhi versus Steph. And plays that amaze. Sadly, the same can’t be said for the quality of many of the accumulated reporters and announcers who also are working the Finals.

NFL legend Barry Sander scored many touchdowns in his illustrious career. When he crossed the goal line Sanders invariably handed the ball to the referee and jogged back to his bench. One day a reporter asked him, “Barry, why don’t you celebrate more when you score an important TD?”

Sanders replied. “I want people to think I’ve been there before.”

Somewhere in heaven, baseball pioneer Curt Flood is smacking his forehead with his palm. 

Some call it analytics. Some call it statistics. Some call it trivia. Others call it a waste of time. But collating and interpreting the reams of data generated by pro sports teams and its stars is now an integral part of sport.

Yogi Berra is notorious for saying “It ain’t over till it’s over”. Yogi was warning about jumping to conclusions in close contests. But he never foresaw a contest that never ended. For reference, consider the he 145th running of the Kentucky Derby. It will probably never be over for those who participated or witnessed the race.

When the law of unintended consequences meets an army of social engineers the result, most often, is the engineers going off the rails. That includes in the world of sports where the best of intentions about equal opportunity for women athletes has been exposed as a scam in the recent Varsity Blues scholarship case in the U.S.

Who saw Tiger Woods’ emotional Masters win coming? Certainly not the William Hill bet shop that coughed up $1.2 M to a single bettor when Woods ended his 14-year winless streak on the PGA Tour’s major events. 

In the pantheon of bad beats, the NCAA semifinal game between Auburn and Virginia has to rank in the Top 10. After erasing a ten-point Virginia lead in the second half, Auburn held a two-point advantage very late in the game. Virginia’s Kyle Guy heaved up a desperate three-point shot as time expired on the clock. It missed.

To everything there is a season. And for those wondering why Major League Baseball opened its season in the final week of March this year (seasons around WW II used to open in mid-April), it’s because leagues have realized that there’s no point playing important games when the audience is looking elsewhere.

As Chuck Berry once said, “It goes to show you never can tell.” While NHL clubs employ the now-accepted Tanking Method to rebuild their rosters, the Calgary Flames seem to have transformed their roster without the requisite embarrassment of repeated last-place finishes.

The Toronto Blue Jays have announced that second baseman Devon Travis will be out till at least May after having surgery on his knee.

Well, Thank God there are some traditions left in baseball. Travis being sent to the infirmary is one of the few predictable things left in the game these days. 

It takes a lot of talent to screw up an NHL franchise in a Canadian city. But Senators owner Eugene Melnyk is up to the challenge. The Melnyk Misery Tour has reduced Ottawa to the frozen equivalent of an Albanian shoe factory.

Has there been a more tender wooing than the Toronto Raptors pursuit of Kawhi Leonard, their presumptive star? Perhaps Prince Harry pitched a sweeter song to his intended Megan Markle. But were the chocolates and flowers from the Palace more passionate and pleading than the Raptors’ entreaties to their meal ticket to stay in Toronto?

O joy.

The Feb. 25 NHL Trade deadline hoves into view just as the NBA’s version of Trader Vic’s has expired. The fact that these two arbitrary dates are considered five-star attractions of the regular season tells you a lot about what a grinding bore the regular season has become in pro sports.