When the sun shines on your dog’s ass, sell the farm. These chances don’t come every day. The bad news about timing is that Toronto’s cap window is about to slam on their fingers. Edmonton needs to move a big salary or three or repeat this frustration. The good news about timing is that they— or the other Canadian teams— can do the job. Just get into the postseason.

The first time I saw Susan Foster’s wonderful smile was in 1991, just after I’d seen Carl Brewer’s legendary scowl. I’d come to their home on Mt. Pleasant Avenue in midtown Toronto to follow a story I was researching about the meagre pensions for retired NHL greats and the corruption of the NHL Players Association under Alan Eagleson.

If ever there were a sign of the world turned upside down it would have to be the bidding war currently driving the value of the Ottawa Senators over a billion dollars.  Granted there is an arena involved, but the market value of a city of 935,000 with little or no industry besides IT and government lucre, and  lying two hours away from the Montreal Canadiens heartland seems to defy economic reality. 

Why no penalty calls in these playoffs? It’s all part of the NHL’s fungible notion of justice. Rules are rules. Unless they aren’t. In search of an even playing field we must first consider timing. Like comedy, NHL penalties are all about timing.

For fans of established NHL teams the sight of the Vegas Golden Knights and Seattle Kraken still in this year’s playoffs— while their own teams are playing golf— is a little galling. Aren’t expansion teams supposed to lose a lot for a long time before gaining success? There’s a reason why things have changed.

For the Flames, the question is existential. How do they make Calgary a place players want to play? They have an old building, a toxic coach, remote ownership, miserable travel, lousy winter weather for families, a depleted farm system and McDavid pounding them in the division for years to come. Until they are a destination, not a no-trade demand, the prospects are problematic.

Now, it appears that it’s all over for Woods as a competitive player if the Tour doesn’t allow him to ride in a cart. Mickelson— who has a lifetime Masters and U.S. Open exemption— will still find a way to match up with the young bucks of the Tour for a few more years. Other LIV stars will keep popping up— and perhaps winning— the majors under their exemptions. The PGA Tour will deny that LIV made them radically overhaul their business model. Sure.

Gary Bettman's NHL never misses an opportunity to miss an opportunity at modernizing its product. Stasis would be the best word to describe the hermetically sealed snow globe that is the NHL. Even when it embraces change it does so in a way that tarnishes the League. See: Non-binary hockey and Pride Nights.

While it is commendable that Brian Burke now supports his son Brendan’s memory, flailing Christians for refusing to wear Pride jerseys is not the way to achieve understanding. Worshipping symbols is a divisive, not a unifying action that plays into the hands of forces Burke clearly does not acknowledge or understand.

It’s telling that the thought police have made organized religion an underdog. James Reimer wanted nothing more than to be left alone with his Christian beliefs. In 2023 that is enough to get you cancelled.

The late pass interference call against Philadelphia in the Super Bowl that swung tens (maybe) hundreds of millions in bets is indicative of the tightrope they now face. You take house money, you had better keep the house happy. Made worse when these calls are handled by part-time NFL referees or NHL refs who never face the media over their calls. 

The first round of the 2023 playoffs in the East is going to be like the Charge of the Light Brigade. Many will enter the valley. Few will exit. There will be many expensive casualties. And, if you’ve been in a deprivation tank the past six seasons, let us remind you that Toronto has lost every year in the qualifying or first round since 2017. Zero series wins. 

While previous attempts to change O Canada had mixed outcomes it appears it’s just a matter of time till Jully Black’s class-conscious culling of the words is accepted. Being generous we here at IDLM thought we’d short-circuit the piecemeal attempts to create a throughly Woke version of the anthem that would last till the latest fad come along.

As stupid as Woods has been the media’s attempt to divide women by their politics is equally stupid and self-defeating. The women we know are better than that. Set the indignation bar higher than Tiger Woods. 

Not much has changed on women’s team sports. There are huge new piles of money coming into sports from digital rights and gambling, yet men still generate the lion’s share. How nowhere is most women’s sport? They’ve legalized gambling on women’s sports— and still no one goes near them.

To comprehend how brilliant he was just look at his doppelgänger today, Connor McDavid. That’s how much he was a force of nature in a game that tried to clutch and grab him, to slow him down, to get him off his game. That’s how you get the nickname The Golden Jet. He was an alpha man. And that makes some people uncomfortable these days.

Regional sports networks have been “a golden goose. You remove cable TV from the scenario, and franchises are worth a fraction of what they are today, players make a fraction of their salaries today… the boom has been going on for almost 30 years.”

If an NHL team held a Christian night, and players were forced to wear jerseys with a crucifix, would you defend a player who opted out because of his conscience? Or would you go full Proteau and say he's a "shameful human being whose religious intolerance is only going to get more shameful over the years”? No one in the chattering class wants to take that on, of course.

Are today’s superstars a product of more than talent? Are they also the products of an expensive, exclusive grooming process that leaves the Bobby Hull farm-boy archetype in the dust? It’s no longer a sport for paupers.

It’s the nature of fairness that it sometimes take a winding road. But in the end all the participants will accept the winners, however grudgingly”.  If only the rest of the culture could do the same. But that horse has left the barn.